Falling on Deaf Ears

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It's Tuesday and we're to the middle of "hell week" for the e3 Tribe.  Okay...we're 2 days in, it just feels like we're almost half way done.  ((That's how I get through harder workouts.  When I'm about 1/4-1/3 of the way finished I tell myself I'm "almost" 1/2 way...)) 

They call it "hell week" for a reason...it's hard.  And...I love it.  Last night when I went to the pool I didn't honestly think I would make it through the whole workout.  I kept wondering if they would have to close the whole thing down if I suddenly puked.  (I sure hope they would close the pool for something like that, but boy do I NOT want it to be because of ME!)

I'm having to daily remind myself WHY it is I'm doing this thing that is so HARD.  When I don't want to get my butt out the door to do my workout, when I think to myself I might want a rest day, when I feel like I need a little external motivation and can't seem to find any...I tell myself what Coach Eric has said time and time again...stop thinking and start doing.

...I stopped writing at that point and started doing something else...it's now Wednesday night...

Today when I drove to the pool I sat in the parking lot a couple of minutes telling myself, "GO IN AND GET IT DONE!!"  It was nice to remember "Reachdown's" blog post from yesterday, and Katie's post from several days back and to know I'm not alone in this struggle.

I was reading a Runner's world forum the other day...this person had written in asking for some help with motivation to continue training for a marathon.  My answer was basically that your motivation MUST come from within.  No one ever has to convince a crack addict to take a hit off the pipe!!  I particularly liked one guy's answer...don't consider it an option.  He linked a blog post he had written about it called "Do I Deserve a Night Off?"  The take away quote from the post:

There is a part of you that wants you to fail.  There is a part of you that wants you to sit on the couch, have a bowl of ice cream, and neglect all that you know is right.  DO NOT LISTEN TO THAT VOICE.

That is the hag in my head...and that voice is falling on deaf ears.  I can't say I'm fully listening to the cheerleader, but I'm doing my best to give 100% in every workout.  I'm frustrated because usually after the fact I don't think what I thought was 100% during the workout was really 100%...but the thing I'm trying to keep in mind is that things look very different after my heart rate has dropped and I'm drying off from the nice hot shower.  The voice I'm trying to hear is the one that's asking me, "ARE YOU GIVING IT ALL YOU'VE GOT RIGHT NOW??"  ...and then I try to give even more.

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:D